Raising healthy, educated, moral, successful children with a sense of civic responsibility in today’s world is not easy. It is also not impossible. Effective parenting is the key. As parents struggle to raise successful children, they need the knowledge and skills to communicate wisely with their children and create happy, loving family relationships and homes. In addition, parents need to know the right approaches to help their child grow properly, both in terms of health and psychology.
In an interview with The FINANCIAL, Temur Mikeladze, Doctor of Medicine, Associate Professor at the University of Georgia, and Head of the Paediatric Service of the Caucasus Medical Center and Clinic “Curatio”, talked about the main challenges and issues relating to the proper upbringing of a child. He highlighted the most important issues relating to children’s sleep, nutrition, and physical activity. In this article you will find useful tips that will help parents looking to improve how they raise their children.
Q. What is the current practice of raising children like in Georgia and what are the main challenges in your experience in this regard?
A. As you know, Georgia is a post-Soviet country, therefore the methods and approaches of raising children have always been different. The ‘90s were characterized by different lifestyles. Children’s sleeping patterns, eating, and education were all significantly different then to how they are today. Nowadays, we see more modern European and Western trends and approaches in how children are raised. On the one hand, this is welcome, because there are more developed methods of parenting, which means raising children in a healthier environment with developed methods. However, on the other hand, we face challenges in this regard as well. Modern trends often don’t correspond with the parenting techniques of the generation of our grandparents and therefore there are frequently disagreements within families due to this. Today’s parents want to raise their children in a modern style, meaning there is often confrontation with grandparents who want to raise the child in the old ways, and sadly all of this results in there being a negative impact on the child’s psyche. I think there should be an assimilation between old and modern trends, because the old approaches are also characterized by many positives. I advise my children as well as patients to keep both the ‘grandparents’ institute’ as well as to introduce more freedom and modern parenting trends to children to avoid the neuro-psychological disorders that are so common in children today. Otherwise this can lead to the involvement of a psychologist, which children often find hard to process, leading to various problems. Therefore, it is essential that children grow up in a healthy environment, taking into account the best approaches (both old and new) for children’s physical, spiritual and social well-being.
Q. The 21st century has been defined as the age of technology. What impact is technology having on children aged 1 to 5, and how is this contributing to problems with diminished socialization? Is there any link between the over-use of technology, and the development of signs of autism?
A. According to recent studies, screen addiction does not cause autism. In general the symptoms of screen addiction include: hyperactivity; obsession; impulsivity; and children getting irritated when parents try to remove them from a screen. The claim that screen addiction causes autism has not been proven. Autism is a pathology that has not yet been fully studied, therefore we can not draw concrete conclusions about its many facets. It is important therefore for a trained paediatrician to detect signs of autism in a timely manner and to also provide an appropriate level of help in a timely manner. As for the role of technology, it must be balanced so that children are not chained to it and this does not pose a threat to their future physical development or ability to socialize with others. The risks and realities of screen addiction should be taught to children (and circumnavigated) by parents through the use of various other incentive mechanisms.
Q. How do sleep problems affect children’s development and how can we help children to develop a proper sleep routine?
A. Sleep is one of the most important functions and requirements for the growth and development of a child. Prolonged sleep deprivation leads to children having character and behavioural disorders, impaired academic performance, and deteriorating health. This is a common problem. It is very important to correctly define a sleep disorder, as it is not simply a matter of subjective perception by the parent; the disorder is influenced by both internal and external factors. Determining these factors is individual to each child. The general recommendation for sleep disorders is to maintain sleep hygiene and establish a pre-sleep ritual, as well as to organize the sleep regime, to develop a biological rhythm, which in itself implies a gradual shift in sleep time.
Q. What basic recommendations would you give parents to regulate sleep hygiene and a regimen in children?
A. Establish waking and sleeping at the same time; introduce healthy sleep habits and routine; select the sleepiest moment for the child and decide on that as the bedtime. It is preferable to go to bed at the same time each day, with any variation on this not exceeding one hour. Regular age-appropriate physical activity and exercise should be scheduled during the day, refraining from daytime-level of activity in the evenings. The bedroom should be quiet and dimly lit. Acceptable low-light night lights for children can be used as those who are afraid of a dark room should also be accommodated. The temperature should be regulated at 65°F (18°C). Do not use the child’s bedroom as a space for entertainment as well as punishment either.
This is but a small list of how to help organize your child’s sleep routine.
Q. How does the psychological well-being or self-care of parents and the family environment affect the upbringing of children?
A. Family environment is a key factor in determining a child’s healthy psychological state. For parents who are divorced, their children may more or less be distinguished by being introverted and having diminished socialization skills. Harmonious coexistence (especially for young children, who are most sensitive) has a great impact on them, although age does not matter, it affects all children’s development equally. Parents must devote time not only to the child, but also to their proper development, self-care, and understanding of traditions and education, which automatically affects the proper upbringing of said child. Conflict environments should be avoided as much as possible to ensure the proper development, socialization and healthy psychology of a child. Families and educational institutions play a key role in raising a child, and even UNICEF recommends that we open schools earlier and close them as late as possible. Therefore, yes, parent’s self-development plays a key role in the proper upbringing of a child.
Q. What impact has Covid-19 had on children’s socialization and what are the key recommendations you would give to parents?
A. None of the strains of Covid-19 are associated with deteriorating health in children, hence parents should be calm about this and less prone to panic. As you know, in general, the virus has confined all people to their homes. It is not so easy for children to be at home all the time, because they have a lot of energy, they want more activity and more communication, which is very important for their physical development. Therefore, parents should try to spend as much time as possible with the child to counteract this. ‘3 minute syndrome’ exists in the morning, ‘5 minute syndrome’ in the evening; parents should pay maximum attention to their child and engage in various activities with them: walking in safe environments; playing; having fun in order to help the child in terms of their socialization and physical development.
Q. Why do people recommend that children play with their reflection in a mirror – what skills does this apparently develop in a child?
A. While playing with a mirror, the child observes and thinks about their actions, sees what they are doing and can therefore analyze it better. Children themselves can observe at this time their behaviour, what benefits or harms them; all this is one of the contributing factors to the child’s self-development. However, just as a child should not be addicted to a screen, so too should play with a mirror be moderated. The parent should balance any action of the child in terms of time, limiting and controlling it as needed, this means catching the golden interval. An individual approach to every child is essential, the parent must have a method of both punishing and encouraging any action. Parents need to develop moderation when playing with mirrors as well as toys. We need to keep a balance when giving them toys, here too the incentive method should work so as not to give too many toys at once.
Q. How much should we force a child to take a particular food when they don’t like it and refuse to eat it?
A. Coercion is never the solution. I don’t condone the practice of forcing a child to fall in love with anything. Therefore, there should be various incentive mechanisms here, including in the form of a toy. Among them, the child should be involved as much as possible in the preparation of the food, decorating the food beautifully, all this fascinates them and shows a more positive attitude towards a particular food. The rule of healthy eating is 50% vegetables, 30% fruits and 20% dairy products, protein, meat etc. If a parent prepares this for their child properly and does not give it to them by force, then they will definitely be receptive to it. The main, golden rule in early-age children in order to avoid problems later, should be breastfeeding. Babies who are breastfed are less likely to have to force themselves to eat a variety of foods after they receive a portion of their mother’s food from an early age. If the baby is breastfed from the beginning, they will eat different foods without force afterwards. Violence is not the solution, other, more effective and enjoyable methods of loving food should be introduced by the parent.
Q. What are the three main tips you would give parents for the proper development of their children?
A. First, dismiss the stereotypes and manage children with ease. Second, be sure to check what children are doing at any age ranging from 0 months to 18 years. At any time of the day, a parent needs to know what their child is doing. Third, we should never force children to do anything. Children need to be busy with a healthy lifestyle: this comprises proper nutrition, physical activity and lots of fresh air. It is also necessary for children to be busy in different circles, be it art, music, dance, etc. All of these are necessary and important for their moral, psychological, physical development, education and socialization.
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